Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Broken promises all day long

Matthew 5:37a
Simply let your 'Yes' be 'Yes,' and your 'No,' 'No';

I've been slowly coming to the point of being honest with myself about this really bad habit. Usually, I have a pang of guilt about it and quickly suppress that thought before it goes any further. Today, I did this all to common occurrence, had a twinge of guilty and then stopped to think about it. Really think about it.
Somewhere along the journey of motherhood, I accidentally picked up this lazy habit. If Bethany or Joseph, ask me to do something. Anything from read them a story, to fix them a drink. If it's not urgent, I am constantly telling them, "Just a minute." or "Maybe later." My intentions are always good, but now sometimes I say these things to them out of habit. I say what I have to, to appease them for the moment. It's an automatic response, I get busy, minutes turn to an hour or two, and sometimes it just flat out never happens. By the end of the day, I have made many broken promises. Most the time if I do get to it, it's because I had to be harassed, stalked and begged repeatedly, until I finally do it.
And, it's not just the good stuff I don't come through on either. It's things like, "If you get out of your bed and make a mess of your room, rather than having rest time, you will get a spanking." Or, "If you hit you brother one more time, you will have to sit in the corner." I've slacked into this horrible wishy-washiness, my kids don't know when I really mean what I say.

Will they really get in trouble? Will Mommy really come get me a snack? She said, she would read me a book later, but will she? I know these are the thoughts going through their little minds, all day long.

I've decided, I need discipline. My promises need improving. If I say I will do something, as in a fun thing or as in training them, then I will do what I said. I am going to keep my word.
I refuse to raise children, that are waited on hand and foot. They do need to learn patience, but how can I demand my children learn patience when they don't know if they are being patient or Mommy forgot, or (gasp) worst of all Mommy lied. I am making a conscious effort to follow through on my words. If it is not something I will do, than I don't promise it to them. If it is not a battle I am willing to enforce, than I don't threaten one. And, if I say I will do something, than I do it. Sooner rather than later, but definitely I do it.
I'm going to see what happens, and trust me, it will be hard to change this. Here's to making more time for them, less time for me and the chores, it's much time needing made.

No comments: