Sunday, February 6, 2011

The things I think about when I have time to think

Happy February stalkers!  February is a big deal at our house.  It's Bethany's favorite month and brings her special day.  Now that Jenna is getting older she'll probably look forward to it just as much.  I'm glad my girls can eagerly await their daddy lavishing them with extra love on the 14th.
More importantly though, I try to focus on God's love for us during this month. I want my kids to always remember that God created them.  His love for them is limitless and has no bounds.  His love can't be measured and nothing we do will ever change its depth or strength.  It is unconditional, whether we accept it or reject it, we are loved abundantly, always.
I really like winter.  While most people are complaining and fleeing to the beach because of snow, cold air and dreary days, I'm enjoying the shorter days.  I like the slowness winter brings to our lives, time seems to pass a little quieter.  It feels less busy, I'm truly a home body.  January and February come after the hustle and bustle of holidays, they bring time to re-organize, everything from the closets to priorities.  I appreciate the long evenings to reflect, the Crock-pot meals, the warm coffee, big pots of soup, the kids burning off their pent up energy by wrestling with Joe and the sun not shining so harshly.  Yes, I know some of you can't believe what you are reading!
I don't make New Year's resolutions but I always seem to set goals.  I strive to become more organized in homeschooling, evaluate things I can improve and further intent on teaching my kids by a more gracious and patient example.  I'm not perfect, I don't succeed at everything I'd love to improve but it's fun trying.  Adding a new baby to the family during this time has completely magnified my need to find a new rhythm to our lives.  I've kinda started from the ground up. Everything from developing new routines to making sure I drink 48 oz of water a day.   It's been about taking all of the vitamins I desperately need at the right times during the day.  I've had to let go of some of my previous commitments to others so that I could make time for myself.  That is a difficult thing to do when I already worry that I'm not making enough time for each of my kids individually or for my husband.  I am learning {again} that it is essential to my attainment of sanity and that an hour or two really goes a long way to helping me reach my desire to be a more gracious and patient example.  I am so thankful for a husband that gets me, he gets my need for time out of the house and he gets my need to be pushed out when I feel guilty for leaving.
I go thrifting and I have time to think, to listen to the radio in the van.  I buy crazy things that make me happy and other people confused, like an ottoman from the 70's.
And I miss my kids, and that is a good feeling.
I would guess that all of us feel like we repeatedly struggle with the same issues in marriage.  I get so frustrated with myself for continually making the same mistake, the same selfish choice, for piling another hurt atop an old hurt because I knew better and didn't do anything differently.  That is why it means so much to me that Joe understands my need for solitude and sacrifices to give it to me.  It's an issue that we don't have anymore because he listened, he put my needs ahead of his own.  He chose to get it, to believe something that he couldn't understand.  I want to become better at doing that for him.  I often arrogantly demand he change his way of thinking for me.  Then he did, and I am humbled by his love.
A love that leads by example.  A love that isn't perfect but strives to be better until it satisfies a need.  A love that is always growing and striving to be more like Christ's love.

9 comments:

Kristen & Cliff said...

Beautiful post Miranda!!!

Catherine Anne said...

"new rhythm to our lives" Each blessing we add to our home I too have to add "new rhythm to our lives"
So happy you are making time for you. You have to.
Loved looking through the blog. You know you are one of my favs. Blessings

Wanting What I Have said...

After reading this post, I think we could be best friends!!! I agree wholeheartedly with EVERYTHING you said!!! Especially about long winter days and the quiet and solitude, the crock pot meals, the big pots of soup (simmering all day!!!) - I love it all. It's one of my favorite times of year! I love cuddling with blankets and fires and the dog sleeping on my feet while I read to the children. It's good. God is good. I am so glad you are enjoying this time!

And I love your new ottoman!!!

Amanda Brady said...

How did you get those words up on your wall?? I love the Oh how He Loves us one.

Miranda said...

I used Carrie's Cricket to cut them out from scrap book paper. Then I glued them to the wall with a glue stick. I wasn't real worried about it since I'm going to paint eventually and think it will just wash off when I decide to take them down. I doubt I'll be able to re-use them though.

Jenn said...

I need me a Cricut!!!! I LOVE how you put the verse on the wall. That is awesome. I have a scrapbook store right up the road. Maybe tomorrow I will go use their Cricut and do the same.

As for Valentine's Day. We love it in this house, but I need to do better at "celebrating" it. I'm going to start doing some googling.

Jenn said...

And by the way...that hour or two ALONE does make a huge difference. I'm so glad your hubby sees your need for it and lets you have "your" time.

Christina said...

Beautiful post. Those couple hours alone really can make us whole again, and it is wonderful that your husband understands and gives you this.
I like the decorations, by the way, too!

jenni said...

i love thrift too ♥