Friday, March 27, 2015

In our house and in my heart

Our March goings ons:
Jenna picked my a big bouquet of Easter Lilly's from my in laws, they have been sitting on the kitchen table making me happy all week.
Bethany had a sudden ear ache on Saturday night and then her ear drum ruptured by morning, she has been struggling with that and a cold since.
I'm fighting a cold this week.
We've been cheering for the CATS and hoping they will go 40-0.
We are rooting just as hard for spring to come and stay. There have a been a few warm, sunshiny days this month but it comes and goes.
We just finished Bethany and Joseph's basketball season and today I signed Bethany, Jenna and Brady up for soccer season.
My sister is getting married next month and I'm preparing for a shower for her this weekend.
Earlier this week we said goodbye to Joe's Mawmaw. One of the last memories I have of her somewhat knowing us was in 2009. She and his Pawpaw were special people, exceptional people. They loved each other so evidently, they loved others well. The very first time they met me, they told me they loved me and I was to call them Mawmaw and Pawpaw from then on. It was a little odd to me at first but after getting to know them, it made complete sense. They spent their lives helping other people, loving on their neighbors and raising their family. Even though I've only known Mawmaw for the past 14 years, her life is a clear picture of what it means to do what matters most in this short amount of time we have on earth. She meant so much to Joe, she poured into his childhood and wanted the best for him always, I love her for that. I'm so grateful we will meet again in heaven and share forever with both his Mawmaw and Pawpaw, because they made the most important decision that can be made, to repent of their sins and give their lives to Christ. Our pastor recently said, "Our time here is so short compared to eternity, this is just a small window of time, but our time here is important because it's when we make the decision of where we will spend the rest of eternity."
I finally took my camera to their last game to get a picture of Bethany and Joseph.
This is what happens when I ask them to put their arms around each other...
Their little mini me's at the game. Climbing on the bleachers like monkey's and swinging punches when they aren't feeling fond of each other, it's about 50/50
BradyBoy recently worked super hard on this mosaic. He had it almost finished and Bethany threw away the rest of the stickers because she thought he had finished it. Like always though, there were little square stickers on the floor and throughout the house, because that's just what things do around here. Every thing has little invisible legs, I swear.
The next day, Brady searched all around the house collecting the color squares he needed from the floor. When it was finally finished he said, "I can't even believe my eyes! I worked so hard on this!" I was impressed with how accurate and determined he was working on it til the end.
LayneeK has taken a huge growth spurt. All the sudden my baby is a big baby. When I took her to her 6 month well visit the doctor commented on her not being able to sit up and I was like, "Oh, is she supposed to be doing that?!" I so do not keep with milestones and I honestly have just felt like she is still a little baby, until last week but I'm still going to keep treating her like she's a newborn until I can't.
Now she is 7 and half months and she is sitting up and loving her food. These pictures are snapshots that I've been meaning to get since she turned 6 months. Crazy Mommy!
We saw a onesie at Target that read, "Current Family Favorite." Bethany and Joseph were the ones pushing me to buy because it's the truth, she is everyone favorite.
 This is her Joseph Smile. She lights up for that boy!
 Joseph came over to give her a drink and then he just did what he always does with Laynee. He melts my heart every day with her.
Best Big Bro forever!
 He lifts her up and blows her belly, she loves that.
My camo wearing, bow and gun shooting boy has the softest heart, watching him grow up is fun.
I don't remember the last time Laynee fell asleep in my arms, she loves her crib. I miss her falling asleep in my lap and I've tried several times lately but I won't complain because she is a great sleeper.
Joe is out right now with Bethany and Jenna to Daddy Daughter Date night at our church. The girls have been counting down since DDDN last year. I can't wait to hear all about when they get home.
There is so much going on in our life and I just want to yell, "STOP!" at the clock and grab up all my kiddos and pile in the bed and snuggle with them, stinky feet, stinky breath and all. Shut the door on the messy hallway leading to tornado wrecked bedrooms, forget the chaos in the kitchen and the mountain of laundry already back in the baskets. I want to shut down my Facebook account and throw away my iphone. I want to snap my fingers and make the tandem meltdowns Brady and Anne have go silent. I just want to slow my pace and see the things that I miss because of all the distractions.
I've been in a difficult season of life this year. People have disappointed me and I've doubted others and mostly myself. I feel like someone ripped off my rose colored glasses and the world will never look the same to me again. It's hard to keep going and at the same time have time to process my feelings and thoughts when I have kids to feed, a household to run and school to teach. I'm trying to sift and sort and clinging to Jesus for dear life. I know that it's going to be okay and I'm grateful that even when my faith in others and myself is shaken, my faith in who God is can stay secure. I trust HIM, I have to tell myself that over and over.
I'm more grateful than ever for the daily beauty I have the opportunity to enjoy, the gifts God gives me in being a stay at home, homeschooling, mom to 6 and wife to Joe. I'm grateful for the hard seasons because I've learned they produce good even when I don't like it at the moment. I keep telling God I know He's working and I keep waiting for my heart to heal.
The reason I started blogging nearly 7 years ago was because I wanted to intentionally savor the gifts I often overlooked in my daily life. The sippycups and fingerprints, that annoyed me at the time but were reminders of the lives I'd been entrusted with and the lessons God taught me through them. I miss having more time to catch up as much of the moments I see and hear and feel here on the blog but I'm trying.
This week I sat in the warm evening air with Anne on my lap and I just ached for stillness. I wanted hold her like that forever. My heart has been yearning for simplicity and needing to self preserve by taking care of myself and my people. At the same time in this season, I've felt called to love others in real life, like forget Facebook comments and surface convos and just show up in the real lives of others. It's hard to explain and it probably makes sense to no one but me, well, I don't even know if I'm understanding it. All I know is things are changing and I want to be honest when I do have time to type a little here on the blog. I'm not trying to present perfection, just trying to save some of the best for remembering later and chronicle this life Joe and I get to share together, the fun and the not so fun.
I heard this song recently and this line stood out to me. I've been trying to let go and trust in Him more. This season is of no surprise to God and I pray that what He wants to change in my heart during this time will change.

1 comment:

Melissa Brady said...

Great post! Love you and your people. <3